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This is a fairly comprehensive checklist that can be filled out by a "sub/slave" and offered to the "Dom/Top" before playing. It provides a quick "head-start" to identifying limits as well as negotiating and finding common ground for play. Dominants may wish to work through the checklist, to get a better handle on their specific interests. Switches should go through the checklist twice, because one persons Dom and Sub interests can be very different. For each item, you need to provide two answers: For experience, write YES or NO next to each item to indicate if you have ever DONE that activity. Mark N/A if it does not apply to your gender. Also, if you ONLY have v/t experience, or r/t experience for a given item... mark "r/t YES v/t NO" or something similar, to mark that difference. For willingness indicate for each item how you feel about DOING that activity by rating it on a scale of 0 to 5. If not willing to do something in v/t that you do in r/t, or vice versa, do annotate that as "r/t 3, v/t 5", etc...
"?" means you don't understand what the item is attempting to describe. NO means you will NOT do that item under any circumstances (a hard limit). 0 (zero) indicates you have utterly no desire to do that activity and don't like doing it (in fact, may loath it) and would ordinarily object to doing it, but you would permit the Dominant to do it if it they really wanted it. (sometimes called a "soft limit"). 1 means you don't want to do or like to do this activity, but wouldn't object if it was asked of you. 2 means you are willing to do this activity, but it has no special appeal for you. 3 means you usually like doing this activity, at least on an irregular/ occasional basis. 4 means you like doing this activity, and would like to experience it on a regular basis. 5 means the activity is a wild turn-on for you, and you would like it as often as possible. * Mark with an asterisk those items which you are willing to do only with your current sex partner(s), but not with casual play-partners. Notes & Nuances ... note any additional information or nuances which might be important for your Dom to know in the margin to the right. For example under diapers you might wish to distinguish between "wetting" and "soiling". Place a NUMBER in the notes and nuances, when you wish to comment on the activity with pertinant details. In the comments section below, NUMBER each paragraph/section, of your comments There is intentionally some overlap between categories. Unless otherwise stated, the sub is the recipient/target of the activity. Activity Experience... yes/no Willingness... No or 0-5 Notes & Nuances |
Abrasion Age play Anal sex Anal plugs (small) Anal plugs (large) Anal plug (public, under clothes) Animal roles Arm & leg sleeves (armbinders) Aromas Asphyxiation Auctioned for charity Ball stretching Bathroom use control Beastiality Beating (soft) Beating (hard) Blindfolds Bloodsports Being serviced (sexual) Being bitten Breast/chest bondage Breath control Branding Boot worship Bondage (light) Bondage (heavy) Bondage (multi-day) Bondage (public, under clothing) Breast whipping Brown showers (scat) Cages (locked inside of) Caning Castration fantasy Catheterization Cattle prod (electrical toy) Cells/Closets (locked inside of) Chains Chamber-pot use Chastity belts Chauffeuring Choking Chores (domestic service) Clothespins Cock rings/straps Cock worship Collars (worn in private) Collars (worn in public) Competitions (with other Subs) Corsets (wearing casually) Corsets (trained waist reduction) Cuffs (leather) Cuffs (metal) Cutting Diapers (wearing) Diapers (wetting) Diapers (soiling) Dilation Dildoes Double penetration Electricity Enemas (for cleansing) Enemas (retention/punishment) Enforced chastity Erotic dance (for audience) Examinations (physical) Exercise (forced/required) Exhibitionism (friends) Exhibitionism (strangers) Eye contact restrictions Face slapping Fantasy abandonment Fantasy rape Fantasy gang-rape Fear (being scared) Fisting (anal) Fisting (vaginal) Flame play Following orders Foot worship Forced bedwetting Forced dressing Forced eating Forced homosexuality Forced heterosexuality Forced masturbation Forced nudity (private) Forced nudity (around others) Forced servitude Forced smoking Full head hoods Gags (cloth) Gags (inflatible) Gags (phallic) Gags (rubber) Gags (tape) Gas masks Gates of Hell (male) Genital sex Given away to another Dom (temp) Given away to another Dom (perm) Golden showers Gun play Hairbrush spankings Hair pulling Hand jobs (giving) Hand jobs (receiving) Harems (serving w/other subs) Harnessing (leather) Harnessing (rope) Having food chosen for you Having clothing chosen for you Head (give fellatio/cunnilingus) Head (rcv fellatio/cunnilingus) High heel wearing High heel worship Homage with tongue (non-sexual) Hoods Hot oils (on genitals) Hot waxing Housework (doing) Human puppy dog Humiliation (private) Humiliation (public) Hypnotism Ice cubes Immobilization Infantilism Initiation rites Injections Intricate (Japanese) rope bondage |
Interrogations Kidnapping Kneeling Knife play Leather clothing Leather restraints Lectures for misbehavior Licking (non-sexual) Lingerie (wearing) Manacles & Irons Manicures (giving) Massage (giving) Massage (receiving) Medical scenes Modeling for erotic photos Mouth bits Mummification Name change (for scene) Name change (legal, permanant) Needleplay Nipple clamps Nipple rings (piercings) Nipple play/"torture" Nipple weights Oral/anal play (rimming) Over-the-knee spanking Orgasm denial Orgasm control Outdoor scenes Outdoor sex Pain (severe) Pain (mild) Persona training (in scene) Personality modification (RL) Phone sex (serving Dom) Phone sex (serving Dom's friends) Phone sex (commercial provider) Piercing (temporary, play-pierce) Piercing (permanent) Plastic surgery Prison scenes Prostitution (public pretense) Prostitution (actual) Pony slave Public exposure Punishment Scene Pussy/cock whipping Pussy worship Riding crops Riding the "horse" (crotch tort.) Rituals Religious scenes Restrictive rules on behavior Rubber/latex clothing Rope body harness Saran wrapping Scarification Scratching - getting Scratching - giving Sensory deprivation Serving Serving as art Serving as ashtray Serving as furniture Serving as a maid Serving as toilet (urine) Serving as toilet (feces) Serving as waitress/waiter Serving orally (sexual) Serving other doms (supervised) Serving other doms (unsupervised) Sexual deprivation (short term) Sexual deprivation (long term) Shaving (body hair) Shaving (head hair) Skinny-dipping Sleep deprivation Sleepsacks Slutty clothing (private) Slutty clothing (public) Spandex clothing Spanking Speech restrictions (when, what) Speculums (Anal) Speculums (vaginal) Spitting Spreader bars Standing in corner Stocks Straight jackets Strap-on-dildos (sucking on) Strap-on-dildos (penetrated by) Strap-on-dildos (wearing) Strapping (full body beating) Suspension (upright) Suspension (inverted) Suspension (horizontal) Supplying new partners for Dom Swallowing feces Swallowing semen Swallowing urine Swapping (with one other couple) Swinging (multiple couples) Tampon Training (in ass) Tattooing Teasing TENS Unit (electrical toy) Thumbcuffs (metal) Tickling Triple penetration Urethral Sounds (metal rods) Uniforms Including others Vaginal dildo Verbal humiliation Vibrator on genitals Violet Wand (electricial toy) Voyeurism (watching others) Voyeurism (your Dom w/others) Video (watching others) Video (recordings of you) Watersports Water torture Waxing (hair removal) Wearing symbolic jewelery Weight gain (forced) Weight loss (forced) Whipping Wooden paddles Wrestling |